Comforting Words: Citizen Claudette

Saturday, April 14, 2007

Citizen Claudette

Photo Sharing and Video Hosting at Photobucket When I was a child, my mother used to talk about this place called “Canada.”

She described it as a place of opportunities, which she did not go to because of me.

For a long time, I bore the false guilt of causing my mother not to have pursued her dream for making a better life for herself. Later, I came to learn about choices and released what was not mine to bear.

About ten or more years ago, when life had seemingly start to become unbearable in Jamaica for my then partner and I – due to our sexuality, the economy, family pressure (passive-aggressive) and the strong desire to “run away,” the hunt for an “exile,” started.

Canada was mentioned several times but actual unsuccessful steps were taken in other directions. Finally, we looked to Canada and I did the investigative work, single-handedly put together the formal applications, did the follow up and when the time came sold our property, car and furniture.

One of the desires that was put out to the Universe was that as soon as possible, applications would be made for citizenship. This desire had many sides but on my part, I knew that entering politics was in my charts. It has always been, ever since I was 10 years old, but I stepped away from active political involvement to keep the peace and maintain the privacy that was so important to my then partner.

Coming to Canada, however, this dream started to come alive again and this time, nothing was going to stop me from pursuing it. The first step, however, was getting my citizenship as I learned the history of the country that I have secretly called my “Promise Land.”

Canada means many things to me and I have shared some of that before. In recent months, as I reflect on my life and experiences and try to discern why The Divine has hit me over the head with a brick to get me to listen, I came into the full recognition that Canada is the country where I am to blossom. (Thanks Anni for the new name!)

So back in November 2006, having personally paid the fees for our citizenship, when the letter came that our applications would take 15 – 18 months I smiled. Then four months later, another letter arrived inviting us to sit our citizenship test in three weeks of the date of the letter! I smiled again as this was not the first time the Universe has done this in my life – shortened the wait dramatically but that’s for another post maybe.

On Thursday, April 12, after two sleepless nights preparing for this test, my daughter and I spent exactly four minutes answering the multiple choice questions and walked out of the room knowing that we will soon receive our official notification to a Citizenship Ceremony!

We “high fived,” as we walked out the exam room, beaming and thanking God for taking us through and closer, in my case, to my destiny.

The Universe truly returns to you what you put out and my intentions have been to always be the love that I want to receive. And so, as I entered my work place and unit the next day, I was greeted by my boss, colleagues and women I serve with a “Welcome to Canada,” song and cake. I cried because here I was receiving the most sincere show of love, affection and celebration in a place that many of you never even want to think of visiting for five minutes.

Later that day (Friday, April 13), contrary to the myth that this is an unlucky day, the doctor came into the house! Yes, she is a medical doctor (obstetrician-gynecologist) but she is also one of my dearest and most close woman-friends from the United States. She is always on the phone or arrives whenever I need her most -- she just knows when. She came this time as, in her words, “I hear you and read your blog that you are doing much better and that you are coming into your own finally, but M…F…, I have to lay my eyes on you for myself to make sure!”

And so, in the company of women: Dr. AA, K and my darling senior citizen and wounded healer, I yet again celebrated my soon-to-be-official new status in one of the most beautiful settings – the Strathcona Tea House & Restaurant.

Today, after chatting with AA until the wee hours of the morning, I woke up with this prayer, written by Joel S. Goldsmith in his book The Infinite Way, on my lips:

“The former things have passed away and all things are become new…Whereas I was blind, now I see and not through a glass, darkly but ‘face to face’. Yes, even
in my flesh, I have seen God. The hills have rolled away, and there is no more
horizon, but the light of heaven makes all things plain.”

I am grateful to God – She has been merciful and kind to me. I am happy and I am blessed and…

I am Canadian!





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